When I was a child, I clung to my grandmother. I was a spoiled smarty-pants, decked out in floral-patterned dress shirts and polyester slacks. Within a year of moving to a rougher neighboorhood, puberty hit, my grandmother passed away, and a much darker stage of life began. I don't know if I was looking for grandmom every night, or if it was the storied haunted bedroom I was sleeping in, but needless to say, I wasn't sleeping.
Intense nightmares continued for many years. I felt that spirits were attacking me every night. I would often wake up screaming, prompting my father to run down the hall and yell to the cold air "Leave him alone!" I had no desire at that time to open up psychically. I was raised Catholic, and during most of my early teen years, I believed these spirits were evil and wanted nothing more than to make it go away and sleep through the night. Throughout my teens years, I lived a deeply interior, private existence, with a profound sense of otherness.
I began meditating at the age of 12, focusing on my breathing and developing various mantras to focus and relax my mind. By 19, I had found my way into a meeting group at a couple's home in South Jersey, technically meeting to discuss the book "A Course in Miracles," but it was so much more than just that. Janet Dean was a source of spiritual encouragement for me, and had a background in mediumship and channeling. Her husband Ken guided us in peaceful visualizations to meet spirit guides and loved ones in spirit. I gave my first messages to people I had only just met in this group starting in around 1996.
I began doing private readings in 1999, but was still largely uncomfortable talking about it with friends. When coworkers found out that I claimed to be "psychic," they immediately tested me and wrote me off as a lunatic who might as well have been chasing Big Foot.
My heart wasn't really into my work, and I floundered between jobs. By 2002, I had done over 200 individual readings, but it was still not my main focus. From 2003-2008 here and there I was gaving messages from the pulpit of the Church of Eternal Life, a Spiritualist Church in Westville, NJ and led meditation and psychic development classes at various locations. I eventually shifted my focus back to a "real" career and in 2006 returned to college to finish my degree in graphic design. My ensuing big city magazine job fell through within the first year when the economy tanked and they stopped printing the magazine. I began to feel defeated and directionless spending months pounding the pavement unsuccesfully looking for a graphic design job.
When a family friend at the Jersey shore booked me for a reading in 2009, I was quickly referred to an incredibly supportive group of believers. Before I knew it, I was booked for a weekend, then a solid week, and then a month. With the help of an extraordinary new friend, Joanne (who handled all my scheduling for years and still continues to be a huge support and help) my formerly secret ability swiftly became my main life direction. The more encouraging feedback I received from the people I read for, the more comfortable I became with embracing my abilities.
In 2010, I met Elise, a wonderful and talented woman who I'm proud to call my life partner. I've found it immensely beneficial for me to shed all those terrible years of low self-worth and alienation and find balance in a healhty relationship that grounds me in the physical world! Elise is not just a great partner in life and love, but also an amazing artist whose paintings can be found here: Elise Fine Art (shameless plug!)
While I have been doing readings since roughly 1999, it has been my one and only full-time career since 2009, which is really quite a blessing. I have learned a great deal about my ability over these years, what factors contribute to the circle of spiritual energy and what factors pose challenges for me to establish a clear and flowing channeling connection. I've learned a lot about human nature too, how similar we all are in our emotional experiences, and also how challenging it is for me to read for people who step into the experience with their walls up, guarded or sketptical towards me. I'd rather knock it out of the park every time! And so for years iI struggled to inform people before their readings of what needs to go into it to make it work for me.
After ten years of doing in-home channeling sessions, when I say I've seen it all, buddy, I ain't lying! I eventually found that the required energy dynamics to create that clear circle of energy to channel in various people's homes were just too overwhelming for me to guarantee the same quality experience to each and every group in every situation. So finally in 2019 I stopped driving all over the map and wearing myself thin. Yes, I'm one of those people who put myself out there too much and never managed to figure out self-care! Still learning! Since putting the constant in-home readings on hold, it's allowed me to restore my energy and focus on other things. One door closes and another opens, as the saying goes. I am now shifting my focus towards writing, filming, and teaching! (which is all very exiciting to me!)
I still block off days throughout the week for private one-on-one phone readings. And I always enjoy doing larger group readings that I host throughout the month. Then on my days off, I enjoy trying my hand at more practical Earthly endeavors, being the man of the house, which usually involves frequent trips to home improvement stores. Also, I've become a bit of a craftsman, building hand-carved frames for Elise's paintings. I am always looking for new ways to hone and grow my abilities on this human journey.
I am eternally thankful for the opportunity to touch as many lives as I have. And I look forward to doing this work for many years to come. I always feel a personal kinship with the people I read for and I enjoy and feel a sense of purpose whenever I can help someone with my abilities. I thank you for taking the time to read this and look forward to being able to help in any way that I can.